Some people might wonder, "Is this blog about YOU or your students?!" That's a legitimate question but the truth is my students and how they learn/develop is more important than "what I did,what I ate or where I went" (the most basic, self-centred descriptive blog entries out there). It is our task as teachers (through God's grace!) to "mold minds"-That is something I take very seriously. I post my students' writing because I don't want to forget how precious they are and God often reminds me of that while reading their journal entries. I want my family and friends to know a little more about the concerns/worries/struggles/victories that my students go through as well (without disclosing personal info of course!) in the hopes that faithful Christians will continue to pray for me, my students, my colleagues and this campus. I pray that God will raise up faithful men/women of the Word who shall go forth and change this world through the power of the gospel, a changed life and righteousness in the power of The Holy Spirit!
My grandmother.
Today was my grandmother's birthday, so my family went to grandmother's home. The grandmother is my mother of my mother. Oh, my father went to her home with us. We surprised, because my father didn't express his feelings about us and he is a blurt person. Therefore, my father, mother, and brother went to the grandmother's home by brother's car. My grandmother has lived alone. The wife of maternal uncle and my uncle on the mother's side went to another fine house. My grandmother and the aunt were bad term. My grandmother's house was empty and quiet. Her refrigerator was empty. The refrigerator contains nothing to at. I was dumb stuck. My grandmother is 70 years old. She aged, so she can't shop food easily. My uncle's new house is not far from my grandmother's house. Then, although they didn't support grandmother, at least they should buy foods and bring them for my aged grandmother. Especially, I was disappointed to my uncle. He is defying his parents. I was regrettable for my grandmother. In former days, she was a stout lady, but now she becomes lean. My mother said "If we are rich, we can take her to my home, but we are poor and both my mother and father work, so there aren’t people who take caring my grandmother. My mother regretted. We leaved early, because of my parents' working. My grandmother dropped tears. I saw the scene first time. I and my brother make sure that we should be respectful toward parents. I will never do as my parents like my uncle and his wife.
Breaking my fingers
As I’m in freshmen girls’ basketball team, we started practicing almost everyday. Usually practices begin at 6:00 p.m. We can either eat before practices after. Or we can even let someone else to get take-out. Everyone was doing fine until someone passed me the ball and I broke my middle and fourth fingers. I couldn’t bend them at that moment. And they suddenly turned into red and started swollen. I tried to continue the game but I couldn’t. I didn’t get to go to the nurse but I think I should either go there or get acupuncture tomorrow. The pain was gradually increased and there were many things that I couldn’t do. For example, I couldn’t tie my hair in pony tails, and had hard time taking shower and changing my clothes. Just now, I realized how thankful I should’ve been for being able to use all five of my fingers freely. Also I realized how often I forget to thank God for everything He has done for me. From now on, I won’t forget to thank Him .
No time for a break
Starting yesterday, I had 2 midterms in a row; they were computer and understanding of Christianity. I don't think I did well on either of them. I'm very tired today since I stayed up two nights in a row. During computer midterm, I wasn't able to finish the exam since I ran out of time. This test was on Monday(4/25) so I studied and studied after I came back from church.In my Understanding of Christianity exam I had more time than I needed although I left some of the questions blank. Oh, this was my first time to take midterms in Handong Univ. Under honor code, professors hand out the exams and they leave a classroom telling one of the students to bring all the exams. It was quite shocking to take an exam without anyone except for God supervising. After tests, I heard from some other classmates that there were a few people who opened their books and copied off from the books. Well, I guess they forgot that God is watching everyone at every moment. Anyhow, since I had a long day today, I'm going to sleep as soon as I'm done writing my journal.
A term examination
Nowadays we have a testing period. The schedule of examination is pressure to me. Especially, I’m worried about my English. English is very hard to me. Why I don’t know English… I’m irritable. Why I poor at English? I don’t like me. In this vacation, I will study English very hard, but although I study hard that, I don’t believe firmly about that. Anyway, let’s try hard. .
Play
In the criminal law class, we had to play. The play book must be made by contents of criminal of law’s case. We made a play book. We decided to parody of the program; gag concert. In that program, especially we curtained to copy “a beloved girl” This is very humorous. I play the importance role. I was a hero. I had to too much lovely act. I worried about if I became shameful. I went into training. Especially, I practiced unique action. I want don’t make mistake. Therefore, I practiced hard. I’m afraid. Therefore I had pains in my leg. In the actual play, surprisingly, I became bold. I didn’t shy. I played well. Through this I had a assurance. I was happy. After the curtain dropping, many people in my class recognize me. My character in the play is very comic, so I hung my head for shame. Although it is hard to prepare for play, this was my good memory and this experience teach many things
Summer
SummerI love summer.I feel lively in summer. Green leaves and blue sea make me happy. The sunshine make me feel that I breathe in this moment. Some people don’t like sun, because it make people black.. However I like that the sun is pouring down its full strength from the sky. The sun was beating fully into my face. The heat soak into my body. Green trees greener everyday.I know beauty of God’s creation from trees in summer. It is most beautiful than any other flowers. I love summer’s green.Before sunset I and my friend went to chil-po beach. We laid on the beach, and look up the sky. The sky was filled with pretty clouds. In the sea, many singular fishes jump up. The sea was calm. Only, the fishes jump up, so the rippleless[glassy] surface of the water has small waves. It shined in the sunset light. It was beautiful. I was deeply impressed from that the sight. I didn’t want to forget this sight and feeling. This will be very beautiful memory.I love to drive in summer too. It makes me refreshing. I want to leave to somewhere.I have many memory of summer
Dreamer
Dreaming is very happy.Therefore in this period of my life is very precious to me may be. If I don’t dream, I will be very unhappy people. I am quite within the realms of possibility. I want to be a lawyer. I hope to defend the rights and help weak and poor people. The strong control the weak in essence. The weak are given an unfair treatment. They don’t have money, power, and knowledge of law. As a result, It is hard to resist against the strong to the weak. I want to help them. I want to know what I have to do in this world. What I have to work, what is God’s plan? I want to know acutely. I desire to live the path of righteousness. I dream… I will accomplish my dream, I have to pray to God for my life. I want to be his daughter. However, I don’t exert all possible efforts. Be courageous. Have a an indomitable will. The most important thing is set my goal in life and finding meaning of my life. I’m very happy because I dream.
General cleaning
Today I carried out general cleaning in my room. From the first, I and my roommates plan cleaning. Every Friday, I have to clean our room. However, day by day, we break out promise. Consequently our room became dirty. Our hair is scattered all over our room. A wastebasket is jam-packed. I didn’t realize that fact before, but today they are seems to me. I couldn’t endure this unclean room. Therefore I started to clean up the house. I sweep a room with a broom and my roommate have vacuum cleaned. I wiped with a duster. The sunshine was good. We lifted the bedclothes and we dusted it. I feel refreshed now that I have finished cleaning. I was happy, I could study well. I want to live like today.
A change of courses
Recently, I enervate of my life. I don’t have a strong will about scholar activity. I hate this mind. However, again and again I feel gloomy. I don’t know my dream. I want to be a lawyer, but it is not indefatigable mind. I don’t have in my ability to do study hard. I don’t have endurances. Therefore I am worried about that. My lawyer is law. This major needed endurance. For that reason, suddenly I dislike my major. I became wanted to study scholar of movement. I feel heavy I the chest of law. Instead of law, I want to study math. Thus, I was in agony. I consulted with friends, seniors of mine about the matter.
Good people
I was pleased that I become acquainted with good people. I realized that there are many fine people in the world and in the Handong Univerity. When I was first grade, there was little one around. I thought “In Handong, there are many strange people.” They didn’t fit me. I can’t explain that people, anyway I didn’t like them. Of course, I like some people. However, I didn’t speak frankly to them about my inmost heart. However, in nowadays, I become meet many good people. I don’t know why I met the strange people when I was first grade. Although, I and they don’t spend much time to became closely, we became good friends. I think time is not important.
My Birthday
Last Wednesday was my birthday. However, it was such a nightmare because everyone as well as me was in the mid-term exam period. Before this birthday, my birthday has never been a busy day. This time, but, everyone was too busy to gather to hang out and have a party. Even I was busy for tests, too.Just some good things for my birthday was that I could get a chance to play soccer, got some presents and some of my friends congratulated me........It reminded me of an advice.-Jesus is only your friend.
There's nothing to write about!
That is not a good sign for my English class because I am supposed to write two jounals a week. I thought I have to fix specific dates for my writing because if not, I would not write anything until Saturday, realize that I have not written anything and say in confusion such things like "Oh my goodness! I have not written anything this week! How am I going to handle it!!" So, I decided to write on Mondays and Thursdays every week. That is why I am writing right now even though I have nothing to write about.Common days, I always had something to write about, but not today. That sounds so strange, but it is true because I spent almost a whole day to play on-line games and do cyworld. And, I never want to talk about such things here. If there were something to write about, that could be that I did not play soccer today, not like last four days I played.Ah! there is one thing to write about. I had to skip dinner for some reason, so I was very hungry. I went to my friend's room, and he gave me "Jjapagetti" and "Nuguri" which are sometimes called just as noodles or Ramen. I was really hungry, so I wanted to have both of them and he gave me the solution. He first put them and water in a container, and boiled in a microwave. After that, he put the seasonings of both of them into it. I was so surprised of his doing that, but when I tasted it, I found that the flavor was not only interesting, but exellent as well. That could be the biggest news today, haha.Remember the verse that attaches on the doors of each room in the dormitories.-Psalms 133:1 A song of ascents. Of David. How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!
My Way
"1% of possibility, that's my way" said Napoleon Bonaparte. In the world, many people as well as the young do not know what to do with the future. So sometimes they do not want to try at all, or they try something but easily give it up.You might have heard of the story that Napoleon climbed the Alps with his army a long time ago. Everyone said that was impossible, but he found the 1% of possibility, and tried. Do you think it was easy? Probably not. However, he did not give up, and finally crossed one of the toughest mountain to climb in the world.Not only saying to other people, but also I need to apply this to myself. I am such a person who does not like a challenge in life. Actually, I do not know how to apply, but as considering it always, I believe that it will come to my mind. The possibility can be in studying, sports, or music. What I first need is to find the possibility out. And then I can try and find it out if my way is this or not. However, I will set up my way on God for sure. Why? Becuase He is the only way in the whole world........-John 14:6Jesus answered "I am the only way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
Family
I think family is one of the most important things in most people's lives. Family gives you peace in your mind, rest, and a sense of belonging. Many of teenagers say family is not important, but friends are. I don't think so. Friends can give you fun and entertain you, but it is different from that of family. If you are one who does not like your family, if you think you will never have something like homesick, just try to be far away from your home. You will see that you are not free from homesick which tells the importance of family. I thought I was one of those who don't feel homesick until two years ago which was before going to the U.S. So, I didn't worry about homesick at all. However, about six months later in America, one day, I realized that I was missing home. It was kind of strange feeling, so I was going to make the feeling disappear, but I couldn't handle it. After a few months later, I got back to my home in Korea, I felt comfortable. Nowadays, I'm feeling kind of similar to that time. Even if I have an experience from the previous time, I cannot help missing home. I hope to get a chance to go home soon.
My Parents
I didn't go to my hometown this semester. My roomates went more that twice. Maybe some will think "why they long the hometown? Is there any meaning?" But most people think that their hometown and home is where they can rest truly without any worries and with warmth.And I'm one of them.Yesterday was holiday. It was really good chance to visit my home. However, the class in today caught my legs. I called my home and talked with my parents. I almost cried when I complain my tireness and loneliness.But always there were encouragement from my parents whenever I call to my house." God will use you when you bare that." " We will always be waiting for you."God thank you! Thank you for giving me my parents!
Re-thinking My Major
I took test on last Wednesday, the General microbiology. I heard about bad reputation about that subject. Elders said that it's quiz and exams are the only memory work that doesn't needlogical process. I took two test on that subject and I found that the advice was really true. excessively hard.After that difficult test, I came to my room and meditated bible verse. All of a sudden, I impulsively thought that I choosed wrong major. I followed God's command with all my heart and it was a lie at that moment. I doubted God. "was it right way?" Before the test, I convincedthat it was a right decision. But it was not at that moment.I decided to visit professor. He said that I am doing pretty good job. Kind of leader in sophomore. I realize that my lament was extravagance. Then I convinced that the result is caused by lack of my efforts.I'm gonna do my best till I'm in the heaven where my mission ends.
Recollections of Thailand
In these days, I feel very lonely though there are teammates and many friends are around me. It is not just a matter of that but the problems is I recollect my good pasts. People tend to thinkthat there past was better than the present situation. That leads to hardship. It's my think.I know that fact but I couldn't stop thinking my friends in Thailand.In 1996, it was just place which I travel for my experience and my fun. People in Thailand had no meaning to me. I didn't have any Thai friend or non of my relatives lived there.But the Thailand where I visited with my spiritual helpers, the place was totally different. It was the place where the lost sheeps live. It has greatly changed. Not only the appearance of the city but also my mind got changed. I was really happy that I could do something for them. Also, friends who were in our team was really nice. When I was really exausted and cracked up, they truly worried about me and prayed for me. I couldn't forget that.Actually I miss that situation. Unity and love, devotion and praise were there. Maybe it is my mistake that I didn't look carefully in Handong. But I couldn't forget that.
I Need God
I messed up everything. I'm so fool.Today, I did three wrong things which gave me big hint to find the right direction of my life.First I planned to go to Chinese Lab but the comic book ruined it. I couldn't control my mind.My everything was so useless in front of the temptations which came from the comic book.Second, I promised that I will play basketball only one and half hour but I played two hours.Because of that, I didn't do my homework. I forgot what is really important to me. Myknowledge was really garbage. When I grabbed the ball, it was over. My life cycle was totallydestoryed.Third thing is that inertia caught me stronly with his ugly hands. In these days some questionswas hanging around my head. " Am I doing with my own will?", "Is the right way to fulfil God'sword?", "What am I doing here?" No answer was the answer in my heart. I was so confused,but the problem was I had no time to think about my own life. I studied with out any rest justfor God's name. All of a sudden, however, I found a little clue for my exuasting question.God will not want me to abuse my body, mind, and spirit. Of course my laziness and foolishnessruined my schedule, but now I got new answer. Before I thought myself is nothing but therester for God's people and other neighbor. Before I thought I'm the only human for God holywork. So I burned everything in me without any rest and it has been accumulated for wholemy life. That was the reason for mental enervation and physical illness. Now is the time to fly in the high sky. I don't have time to shrink from my past. Fromtommorow I will start with new minds. Totally different person will stand in frontof God.
Years Wrinkle The Skin But…
"Years wrinkle the skin but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul."-Samuel UllmanI'm losing my enthusiasm of my life. I was not afraid of anything when I was freshman. Even in march, I was not afraid of anything. However, after confessing and rejenction from the girl who I loved, I totally losed my grip. Difficult things in my life are pressing me down more harder than before.The problem is that before rejection I couldn't see her in campus, but now I see her much more than before. Wherever I go, she walk away or eat something. The most heartbreak thing is that sometimes she walks with a guy in her club. It drives me mad.Now my soul is wrinkling. I have to be restored by God. Now it's the time to tolerate.
love is
Love..It’s hard too love who don’t like me. Do you know why? Well….Because my roommate doesn’t like me, I have some stress of loving her.“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.(1 John 4:17)”I know that I should love her….“But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,( Matthew 5:44)” And that I should pray for her..but......!!whenever I try, my mind gets roundabout. know why? Well….Because my roommate doesn’t like me, I have some stress of loving her. “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.(1 John 4:17)” I know that I should love her….“But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,( Matthew 5:44)”And that I should pray for her..but......!!whenever I try, my mind gets roundabout.
marriage
This morning I thought about a marriage.What should my spouse fulfill?First thing … does he trust in Jesus Christ?And the next thing is whether his faith style matches mine.Third, his personality.. view of women, and so forth.Some … may not agree with me but I think even though person satisfies all religious thing, there should be some sense of economy, and economic bloc. This era is basic at liberal economy.Yes… God use not only the rich but also the destitute. Yet…honestly, my cultivation of moral sense is not there.
not for fun but for satisfaction
.... I have liked for fun..Here in Handong... there are not much to enjoy.But now I realized.. I should not live just for fun.I should look for satisfaction-God has given.More time to study. And when I do something, I should do it with all my heart.Such confidence as this is ours through Christ before God.Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant--not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.
I miss my last year team.
.... Nowadays......It's really hard to be with my new team....There is no one to rely on....even no one to speak freely...There is only you...my LORD..my sincere friend." I love you..I hope in you"
Thanks, from the bottom of my heart.
Yesterday was teacher's day.I miss my elementary school teacher, 최정자. I thank her, from the bottom of my heart.I met in the Korea elementary school in third grade(?).Well, she was not a Christian but she really took care of me.It is a sad story that sometimes Christian is worse than the people whom do not believe in Jesus Christ. Worse!!What the matter with us? The answer will be that we are not the true Christian....Christian Mento……I pray “Father, make me be the light … like lighthouse make me attract people to your truth.” " and lead me to meet the Christian mento... and let me be the one."
everyone has pain..
Human could think.. This is the origin of problems.Thinking .. and reminding …People… and I think too much about yesterday’s behaviors and talks…Even though that can’t cause any different.Only thinking and thinking…this make wounded part not to close...Because I was really lack of thinking of my life until high school life,I tried to think more ... by intention.. but what I reallize is...Thinking also have many kinds..Thinking about past is the worse thinking process..
Disorder Plans
This semester is almost in the end.Well… the final exam is still remained but~!!!The summer vacation is coming… great!No plan, No gain~ (I made it, good?^^;;;;)Vacation plan~!First, I’ll lose some weight. My roommate told me that she saw a popular women’s magazine and there was written that if woman lose weight men saw her nearly 40 times more beautiful.And some study is needed… preparations and reviews of lessons.But plan… is one thing execute is another…
“(Col 3:24) Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ.”Serving Lord…must be first…! Whatever I do.. I should do it in front of God..This is my decision…and plan…
